When it's no longer all about blowing candles and fancy cakes.

“There is always, always, always something you can be grateful for. Always.”

First and foremost, I owe an apology to my blog here for abandoning you and for the lack of updates. I have been busy, and even if I did feel like updating my blog, I couldn’t seem to sit down and write things out. Some may regard it as writer’s block, I personally feel it’s due to lack of inspiration and the workload I have and the constant pressure to ace in college, and well, everything.

Today, 22nd July 2011, I officially turn 19 years young, and to be living life so far for nineteen years, I feel like penning down what I feel, think, and hope…so here I am.

It does not surprise me anymore on how extremely fast the time flies…like literally in a blink of an eye it’s July, and even July is ending in like ten days. And now, I am nineteen years old, another one year left till I end my so called “teen life”. I feel…..old. Well I bet that’s how most of us will feel every time our birthdays come, no?

I once read, the past is not really a place for us to stay but rather to visit once in a while, yes something along that line, which I completely agree. So now, I am visiting my past, and reflecting what life has made me into so far, how the past eighteen years of living life has shaped who I am today. I think no word could faithfully justify how grateful I am for this wonderful life I am living, so thank you God, Alhamdulillah.

I could still remember when I was a kid; birthday was one of the things I anticipated. I remember celebrating it with my families, in the living room, and my dad bought fancy cake that had Minnie Mouse and Donald Duck pictures on it, dinosaur’s figures of candy, chocolates and candles, ahhh nostalgic. Birthdays to me when I was little, was a celebration of growing up. Now, birthdays to me is more like a celebration of growing old, if you get what I am saying. Of course, we could always stay young at heart, but the fact that we’re going 18, 19, 20 and so on instead of 20, 19, 18.. remains, no?

Ironic how when I was little I used to wanting birthdays to come faster so I can grow up and do so many things, but now I wish time could probably slow down a little, because apparently growing up most of the times means bigger responsibilities. But I guess one of the perks of growing up, I look at birthdays from a different point of view. Birthdays to me today ain’t all about the cakes, gifts, wishes and balloons, but the fact that I am living another year of life and how amazing my life and the people in it have been, how beautiful life is, these things are what birthdays remind me of. Things that we humans seems to forget because we are too busy focusing on what we don’t have. Things that we fail to realize because we are too busy using our pasts, and sometimes our futures, to escape our present days.

I am reminded again today how wonderful my life has been, and I swear to God I have the most amazing people in my life, even amazing won’t put it to just. Of course I had my fair share of hardships in life, I had my fair share in learning some things are not meant to be, that some things do not work like how we would want them to, that even in the lowest points of your life there are always good things hidden behind them, a bless in disguise.

My wish list would never end if you are asking for one haha, but the one thing I never stop asking God from is for me to live a blessed and happy life with the amazing people I have, and to succeed here in life and in the afterlife. Amen.

I would also like to take this opportunity to sincerely thank everyone for the wishes, be it through texts, phone calls, videos, Facebook, and Twitter, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. I have replied to all of them, or so I believe, let me know if I have missed any of them, I wouldn’t want that. My family, hommies, girlfriends, facebookers, tweeterhearts, literally everyone who have wished me, I genuinely thank you. It is also important for you guys to know that you people are beautiful, amazing and wonderful! Never let anyone else you the other way around. Thank you girlfriends and hommies for changing your profile pictures that have me in it, you guys look awesome tee hee.

Thank you again wonderful people, I love you guys! (:

Take care lovely people, hugs hugs hugs ♥